The feeling of being closed in, trapped, it’s hard to take.  Stuck in a place that you wish you didn’t have to be.  Missing the things that you really need to surround you.

For myself, and those I relate to the best, it’s missing the natural world that closes me in.  Missing getting lost down some winding trail in a forest near the lake.  Missing dipping my toes in the river just to feel its gentle flow between my toes.  Missing the scent of the air, the fallen leaves in autumn, or the sweet smell of spring flowers on the breeze.  Those are the things that make me feel free.

Though a visit to the city is always nice, the longer I stay, the more I feel it closing in around me.  I escape it often, but the days spent in it grow longer, and harder to take.  So much so that I sometimes feel it tightening up around me, holding me here and drawing me into its unnatural world.

Claustrophobia felt even on these city streets.

Surrounded by these buildings, slowly defeats.

No trees around with space to grow,

Disrupted by an environment without real flow.

A lack of a crisp fresh breeze off the lake,

Without a flower to smell, it’s hard to take.

No sounds of the forest to pull me awake,

Closed in instead by the modern and fake.

This space is so full, but feels empty.

Missing something in a place that offers plenty.

Nowhere around offers that needed natural serenity,

Every turn instead holds other forms of vanity.

Polluted by the things that no one needs for real,

A lack of fresh air it has, no nature to feel.

 

Thankfully, a good conversation can pull my mind back to where it wants to be, and the weekend is close enough to plan another escape.

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